Just because you put your wallet and your passport in your snazzy, over-the-shoulder flight bag yesterday when you went to the post office to pick up a parcel, doesn’t mean to say that it will still be there today. There’s an exceedingly high probability that you dropped the passport in the Postamt and they’ll have given it to the police. So when you decide it’s time to leave to go to the airport (it’s only 4 stops on the S-Bahn - it takes 10 minutes), pick up the plane ticket from the shelf and decide to put it in the bag next to the passport, don’t act all shocked and surprised when you discover it isn’t there.
Yes, you’ll have very little time to retrace your steps from yesterday, go to the post office and then the police station, fill out the necessary form, say a silent thank you to the kind and honest soul who handed it in, but if you get a taxi, you’ll still make it to the airport in time for the evil, incalcitrant twat at the check-in desk to inform you that check-in for that flight closed 5 minutes ago.
Don’t be distraught though weary traveller – this will allow you to go to the Lufthansa and British Airways desks and ask how much a single flight to Manchester later that evening costs. You’ll find the figure that they quote so absurdly high as to be amusing. In fact, it’ll provide such comic relief that you won’t feel quite so bad that your ridiculous sense of decorum and reserve prevented you from smacking that check-in man to the ground, all the while repeating the sentence, “yes but look at the departures table you cretin, the plane is delayed”.
You might not however, be able to avoid the lingering suspicion that some part of your sub-conscience wanted you to drop the passport, just to avoid going to Bradford.
German Phrase For Today: “Fundbüro” - Lost property office
Song playing as this was published: Squeeze “Pulling Mussels”
The lack of further elaboration is delicious; sorry to learn of your troubles, and a sort of congratulations on your lucky escape. That is, unless you did buy a new ticket.
oh goodness that stinks. next time book a flight to NYC
Does that mean you are going to join the campaign for a UK ID card any minute now?
If I should ever lose my passport I always got the ID card as a back-up for returning home or for travelling within the EU.
Despite the fact that I had to rub it in, I am sorry about your financial loss. Maybe if you stress the point that your flight got delayed, customer service will give you something like a voucher.
JCS
Erin: I have brown hair. Brown hair! Of course, it might have a reddish tint to it if If the sun shone onto it as I was being driven around in a convertibe mini with the roof down…..
Stairs & JCS: It was a Hapag Lloyd Express flight - it cost €21 plus tax return. I’m really just happy to have the passport back, which was much more valuable. It was 82°F/28°C here today, I sat in the garden, bottle of ice-cold Czech beer in my hand and felt at ease with the world. I really could have throttled the guy at the check-in though..
JCS: Id (as Freud would say) cards. It’s not the physical card itself that I dislike the idea of, it’s several issues which it raises that bother me. Namely; the exact relationship between state and subject/citizen - a subject that far more intelligent minds than mine worry about and the “must one carry it at all times?” question, and can it be demanded of you at the discretion of whichever government agency/security apparatus part. Those are, I find, somewhat abstract notions of what it means to be English/British and living in England/the UK today, I suppose. The thing that really gets me, the one thing that immediately, and not in any abstract way makes me dislike them is that they are the exact antithesis of German ID cards. See - database linking. It is not (as with German ID card), that the data about the person is kept seperate between different agencies (and stored at local, rather than national level) - we don’t need to go into the history of Germany and state registers methinks. The UK ID card is the exact opposite though - it is meant to bring as much information about the individual together - not on the card itself, the card is almost irrelevant, but on the various interconnected databases where the individual will have the same ID number. If I’m not mistaken, it’s illegal in Germany for different government agencies to collate data about people in such a manner (although I’m sure the BND could find out anything they wanted to within a few seconds). Basically, if I have to have an ID card (which I’m not happy about) I certainly wouldn’t want to be compelled to carry it with me (as is, technically, the case here), but I’d want it to be administered the German way, if I did need to prove my identity to (say) pick something up at the post office.
As for the relationship between citizen and state - is the government an instrument of, or the rulers of the people etc, and how do ID cards alter that. I reckon thats a talk for another day. And if I’m ever in Berlin, over a beer. Cheers!