Just because the term is “Phishing” rather than “Fishing” for information doesn’t mean that littering your e-mails with grammatical and spelling mistakes is a good idea. If you are going to target people in Germany with mails at least learn a little about the background details.
I must admit, you almost got be this morning by sending me an e-mail from “Deutsche Telekom” with an Online-Rechnung (or “bill” as we say in English) for November to the tune of €805.10 I almost, almost, clicked on the link to ask “what the f**k?” until it dawned on me that, not only was that ten times higher than usual, but that Germans use a comma instead of a decimal point – Now, the idea that Deutsche Telekom could screw up is oh so believable – anyone could fall for it, you were so close and yet, it’s always the small details isn’t it? Next time, eh?
Less successful still was “Deutsche Bank”, with its opening line “Geehrte Kunden und Kundinnenu Deutsche Bank!” Not a good start to getting me to tell you my account number and access codes. Not actually being a Deutsche Bank customer was kind of a giveaway too…
The “Volksbank Raiffeisen Bank Inc.” (Inc?) were doing better until they got to the phrase “…wird an alle Kunden gesandt”. “alle Kunden” and “gesandt” ? You were almost there. Eight out of ten for effort.
German Phrase For Today: “Deutsch” - You know….
Song playing as this was published: Thomas Dolby - “Eastern Bloc”
I’ve had mails here at work from Volksbank Raiffeisen Bank, and even though my command of the German language is not that great even I could spot it was bollox.
But perhaps the best prevention is to not read emails in German - just delete them. I have days when I do this……it’s uplifting for the soul.
They, the Germans, don’t always use a comma instead of a decimal point. My bank (one of the “Volksbanken-Raiffeisen” Banken - so perhaps they’ve had their Kontoauszugsdrucker hacked) always insists on using a . not a , - and if I’d known this beforehand I probably wouldn’t have entrustd them with my low wages. Come on, it’s like getting a tenancy agreement or a work contract that’s been produced using “Comic Sans”. You just don’t want to do business with that kind of person/firm.
P.S. My boss is a big fan of Comic Sans.
Haddock: Perhaps temporarily soul-uplifting, but all my contracts and work offers arrive in German. Come rent-paying time the request for payment might be a bit of a downer.
Daggi: I wrote a post a while back about people who got married at Alton Towers. Most popular choice of font for the Order of Service cards? I let you guess….
My personal most-loathed font is Mistral, the one that looks like perfectly legible handwriting. I can’t believe how often I see it used, and I always think it’s such an incredibly lazy piece of ‘art work’. I’m afraid our French cousins go in for Comic Sans galore. Not a good choice. But they don’t get married at Alton Towers. Also not a good choice (I mean the marrying there, not the not marrying there).