After being away from Britain for some time, remembering only warm summer days, lazing, drinking fresh lemonade whilst watching cricket, it may come as a surprise to learn that “as a result of climate change*” it now rains in Britain. And sometimes there’s even stormy weather.
Obviously, it was not always thus: one need only look at the antiquated graphics that the BBC’s weather department use which still insist upon showing Britain as a desert or listen to the tones of incredulity as forecasters predict that it will be turning colder next week and “there might even be some snow over the Scottish Highlands” to realise that this is a new state of affairs.
Thankfully it will soon be April and then there’ll be a hosepipe ban because of the impending drought. But if you ever move back to the UK - you might be surprised that the advice is: “Bring a brolly.”
* Nowadays, everything is a result of climate change: “Scientists have said that average temperatures being lower in January than in June is a result of climate change.”
Song playing as this was published: The Wannadies
Never could work out that map. Looks like the UK (or the world, until BBC chickened out of DVB in Berlin) had become a beach (a British-style beach) with lots of damp patches.